Recipes

Nick's Mother's Spinach Recipe, as interpreted by Sault
Stanley's Spinach Dish
Fred's Molten Cheese Triscuits
Wayne's Chicken Curry
Stanley's Bacon Sandwich

 

Nick's Mother's Spinach Recipe, as interpreted by Sault

Ingredients:

1 package frozen spinach -- (10 ounce) thawed & squeezed dry
One pack Hillsboroughs
2 cups feta cheese
3 eggs
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 cup mashed potatoes
Salt
1 small onions -- chopped
2 tablespoons melted margarine

Directions:

Thaw spinach in refrigerator overnight or in microwave oven, or really just toss it in the sink and run some hot water on it for a few minutes while you have a smoke. After thawing, squish the liquid out of the spinach, but don't take out the day's aggression on it or it'll turn to mush. Put feta in a bowl. Stir in unbeaten eggs. Add flour, potatoes and salt to taste; mix thoroughly. Watch that you ash-off your cigarette from time to time, but then again, a little ash in this won't matter. Extra zip, I always say. Saute onions in margarine until wilted. Add to flour mixture. Drop pieces of spinach into the mixture and fold them in gently, so they don't disintegrate completely. Pour into a greased 1 1/2-quart baking dish and bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour. Enjoy by yourself, in front of the television; salt liberally with your own tears.

Note: If the spinach is very cold, it will take a little longer to bake.

 

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Stanley's Spinach Dish

Ingredients:

Rachmaninoff, Morceaux de Fantasie
Three bunches fresh spinach -- frozen is an abomination
New York Times Sudoku -- Sunday edition
2 cups small-curd cottage cheese
2 cups 30 year-old scotch
3 eggs
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
A dollop of Dijon
Salt
1 small onions -- chopped
2 tablespoons melted margarine

Directions:

While the spinach steams to the strains of Rachmaninoff, put your feet up and start the Sudoku. There won't be time to finish it yet as spinach steams quickly. Cool the spinach; complete the Sudoku. Once cooled, press most of the liquid out of the spinach. Pour yourself a liberal amount of scotch as you put the cottage cheese in a bowl. Stir in unbeaten eggs. Savour the scotch. Add flour, cheese, dijon and salt to the cheese/egg mixture to taste; mix thoroughly. Saute onions in margarine until wilted. Add to flour mixture. Drop pieces of spinach into the mixture and fold them in gently, so they don't disintegrate completely. Pour into a greased 1 1/2-quart baking dish, preferably something in Italian ceramics, and bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour.

 

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Fred's Molten Cheese Triscuits

Okay this is actually harder than it sounds. First you have to bake the Triscuits (ironically this makes them Quatrecuits) on a cookie sheet, with some parchment paper or tin foil under them. Bake them at a high temp. for a very short time. Careful...not too long or they might get burned.

And then it depends: if they're for yourself use some Velvetta or other brand name cheese slice---NOT skim milk or low fat!! Take the unwrapped slice and fold it twice into quarters. And place the little stack of cheese food on the baked triscuit. Repeat for as many crackers as you want.

Then put it back into the oven and broil! Keep an eye on this because it'll start melting pretty quickly. But I like to keep it under until the cheese is slightly browned.

It might be pouring off the cracker by that point but that's what the parchment paper is for-- to hold the delicious drippings. Using the paper as a transfer sheet slide the molten cheese deliciousness onto a plate.

If it's not for yourself. Then use a quarter piece on each cracker. It will mean fewer strange looks and save precious cheese.

 

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Wayne's Chicken Curry

Single guys are always relying on Spaghetti or BBQing to show off their cooking skills.
Well, I'm afraid the ladies are on to us, boys.

When I meet a woman I'd like to impress, there's nothing like a batch of homemade Chicken Curry...
The first thing you have to do though is decide where you want the curry to be from. Seriously, there's Thai curry, Indian curry, uhm, American Curry. Be specific.

Me, I like to open an Atlas and pick... for example today my dish will be......Bangalore Curry.

So I'll need: Chicken, a couple skin boneless breasts. A bag of frozen stir fry veggies. One bottle of one flavour of curry sauce, plus one tin of a different flavour of curry sauce. (Like a bottle of Korma sauce and a tin of Tika Massala or a bottle of Madras and a tin of Butter Sauce, you get the picture. The important thing is the two different curry flavours and the two different containers. I don't know why, it just works!)

1. Brown the chicken in a frying pan.

2. Thrown on some frozen veggies.

3. Add a little water--- or better--- vino! And let the veggies steam and thaw.

4. Add the bottle and the tin. And let simmer for a while.

5. Hide the bottle and the tin! When she asks how you made it, smile mysteriously and say "It's just a little something I picked up when I was in the far east." She doesn't have to know you mean Corner Brook, Newfoundland.

6. Make a little rice to go along with it. Jasmine Rice is nice... but if you don't have any that's fine. Some Uncle Ben's using half water/half ginger ale (instead of just water) will give the dish that authentic...Bangalore flavour.

Enjoy!

 

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Stanley's Bacon Sandwich

The secret to a fine Bacon Sandwich is simple: Don't be cheap!
There's only three (or four) ingredients, best is best.

1. Bacon. Brand name, maple smoked. You don't have to be insecure and get peameal or back bacon. Just good brand name bacon.

2. Bread. You might be tempted to go for a whole wheat or multi-grain bread, in the misguided belief that the healthfulness of the bread might counter-act the other ingredients. They won't. Don't bother. Get a fine white bread. A loaf of challa wouldn't be a bad choice.

3. Heinz Ketchup and some Hellman's Real Mayonnaise.

4. A pad of butter.

That's it.

Fry the bacon. In a frying pan, not a microwave. Crispy.
Toast the bread. Golden.
Spread the butter. Evenly.
Place the bacon on the toast. In a grid.
On the other piece of bread spread the Mayo. Be generous.
Pour the Ketchup on the grid of bacon.
Cover with the Mayo'd toast.

Cut into quarters. Or halves.

Recommended wine: A full bodied red. A nice Chilean perhaps.

Bon Appetit!

 

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